


Umbrella for Two?

by Sittingbyawindow



Series: Kingsman AU [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!, Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Clothing Porn, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, F/M, Gun Violence, Kingsman AU, Kuroo Tetsurou is a Tease, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Other, Pining, Slow Burn, Spies & Secret Agents, Spoilers, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, Violence, glasses for everyone, really slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:47:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25343416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sittingbyawindow/pseuds/Sittingbyawindow
Summary: Tsukishima Kei didn’t expect to become an international secret agent and, yet, here he was in a beautifully bespoke suit flying to Kentucky, USA to meet with the Kingsman’s American cousin, Statesman. Tsukishima also didn’t expect to open up his heart to anyone, yet, one Kuroo Tetsurou somehow kicked his way in.An action-adventure crossover AU set after Kingsman: The Golden Circle.Spoilers from both Kingsman movies and some minor retcons.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji/Tsukishima Kei, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi, Yachi Hitoka/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Series: Kingsman AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1837498
Comments: 41
Kudos: 28





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For clarity, any language spoken that isn't English will be _italicized_.

"Since 1849, Kingsman tailors have clothed the world's most powerful individuals. By 1919, a great number of them had lost their heirs to World War I. That meant a lot of money, going un-inherited, and a lot of powerful men with the desire to preserve peace and protect life. Our founders realized that they could channel that wealth and influence for the greater good. And so began our other venture. An independent, international intelligence agency, operating at the highest level of discretion. Above the politics and bureaucracy that undermine the integrity of government run spy organizations. A suit is the modern gentleman’s armor, and the Kingsman agents, are the new knights."  
-Harry Hart

* * *

If someone told high school Tsukishima Kei that he would end up leaving Japan and become an international spy who went on missions to save the world, he would have calmly walked away after asked the person to stop sniffing industrial glue. Little did high school Tsukishima know, that would be exactly what happened. He didn’t expect to take on an internship with the London Natural History Museum after graduating from university. He didn’t expect to, with his sharp mind and troublesome sense of curiosity, follow a hidden trail of clues to a tailor shop. He didn’t expect to find a secret intelligence agency recuperating from loss, nor did he expect to accept their offer. And yet, here he was, dressed to the nines in a bespoke navy pinstripe suit and brown oxfords, hiding behind some metal crates as Russian gunmen tried to pump him full of bullets.

Tsukishima brushed a loose strand of wavy blonde hair back into place in his styled side-part as he assessed the situation. He already found the kidnapped girls and directed them to stay in the hidden bunker he cleared out a couple hours ago. He was also able to access the sex traffic ring’s office-allowing Merlin to hack in-taking all the data he could, while leaving some nasty viruses in his wake. It was when Tsukishima was leaving, that some goons realized the girls were missing and spotted him. Now, he had to begrudgingly put in the effort to survive and decimate the group the old fashion way. 

The continuous gunfire suddenly stopped, and Tsukishima knew that the enemy was probably advancing on his position. He peeked over the crates and glanced around the rather empty warehouse. There were ten men with large assault rifles slowly advancing towards him, the leader of the group yelling out orders behind them, and one sniper even further behind on a high walkway, gun trained and ready to fire if Tsukishima so much as poked his head out. Although it looked tricky, Tsukishima formed a plan and gripped his umbrella tight. 

After a couple quick breaths, Tsukishima went into action. He leapt up from his hiding place and opened his umbrella, facing the enemies. A loud ping sounded when the sniper’s bullet deflected off the ballistic shield of the black umbrella. Knowing the sniper had to reorient himself, Tsukishima pressed the trigger on the umbrella’s handle, firing a bullet straight into the sniper-that was one, he mentally counted in his head. Even before the sniper’s body fell from the walkway, Tsukishima rolled into a crouching position, deflecting the new rain of bullets coming from the gunmen on the ground. Looking through the digital screen on the underbelly of his umbrella, he deftly fired bullet after bullet with his unconventional weapon, hitting vital spots when he could (two, three, four) or their hands to force them to drop their weapons. 

Unfortunately, the umbrella was running out of bullets and the shield was taking too much damage, so Tsukishima quickly rose from his crouch and ran forward. As a well-timed distraction, he threw it at a gunman’s face like a javelin, as he pulled out his pistol and fired upon the others (five, six, seven). Now, he was in close combat range and the enemies charged at him. He fired a shot at the man who was struggling with the thrown umbrella (eight) as he dodged a knife strike from his left. He heard footsteps rushing him from behind, so he firmly clicked his heels to release his toe knife and swung his long leg at the approaching man. He could feel the shoe’s blade contact flesh and he knew the neuro-toxin would do the rest (nine). He tried his luck and kicked forward to hit the man to tried to slash him from before. There was contact with the man’s stomach (ten). 

With only the boss and a single gunman left, Tsukishima glanced around before dodging more gunfire. He looked up and saw the two remaining enemies running away while firing behind them. _‘Cowards,’_ thought the agent. Tsukishima pulled out his _Eau de Parfum_ from the inside of his jacket, popped off the cap, and pressed the pump to activate the timer. He began to run towards the two men in a zig zag to avoid the sporadic gunfire. Although the men had exited the warehouse, Tsukishima wasn’t worried. Once he was at an appropriate distance, he chucked the cologne bottle with precise aim and ducked behind a wall. 

Boom! The napalm bomb disguised as a bottle exploded and burst into flames that engulfed the two enemies. Tsukishima waited for the flames to die down before checking the results. He found the last gunman, who was closer to him, silent and burnt to a crisp on the ground (eleven). He looked beyond to see the boss convulsing in an attempt to gasp for air. Straightening out his suit, Tsukishima calmly walked over and then crouched down to look at the bosses charred face. 

“You know, you really should have been more careful when deciding on a career.” The man’s eyes were wide as he looked at Tsukishima with a mix of fear and, possibly, anger as he took a ragged breath. This made Tsukishima coldly smile as he stared down at the man. “You could have had a quiet normal life, but instead you wanted to be immoral and make the big bucks by selling people. Now look where you are.” The man’s breaths were becoming fewer and far between and his eyes turned desperate and panicked, never leaving Tsukishima’s. With a wider smile and a glint in his golden eyes, Tsukishima decided to put the final nail in the coffin and wished the man well, “hope you enjoy your new life in hell, you sick fuck.”

(Twelve)  


* * *

Although the battle ended swiftly, there was much for Tsukishima to clean up before leaving Serbia. He regrouped at the hidden bunker he left several hours ago (not before grabbing his umbrella), knocking in a sing-song pattern for the rescued girls to recognize it was him. When a couple girls shakingly opened the heavy bunker door to peak out at him with frightened eyes, he attempted to give the most reassuring smile he could. He ushered them out, softly murmuring in Serbian that things were going to be ok and he would take them home. 

A group of sixteen girls, all preteen or younger, held hands or carried those who couldn’t walk as they followed their tall, expensively dressed blonde savior. It was almost like a mother duck and a gaggle of ducklings who would scuttle behind. Even though he wanted to get this mission over and done with, Tsukishima would stop every now and then and patiently waited for all the girls to catch up to him before continuing. He made sure to take a route that avoided the corpses he himself created-the young girls have already gone through enough trauma. After about a silent hour’s walk, they all reached his rendezvous point, where assisting agents gathered up the girls to return them to their respective homes. His mission was complete. 

He was about to head off towards his jet, to go back to base, when he felt a light tug on his navy pinstripe pants. Looking down, he met the eyes of one of the girls. She looked no older than ten years old, thinner than what would be healthy; dark brown hair laid limply around her once cherubic face that was streaked with dried up tears. But, unlike many of the other girls who still had eyes filled with fear and apprehension, this one’s blue eyes were clear and certain. Tsukishima continue to stare down at her in mild confusion, wondering what this child wanted.

“ _Hvala vam_ (thank you),” she murmured up at him as she let go of his pant leg. It took Tsukishima aback. He almost raised his hand towards the small girl, as if to pat her head, to signal that things would be ok and she would be safe, but he just stuffed said hand into his pocket instead. He gave her a slow nod and continued on his way, the girls and other agents watching his back slowly grow smaller.


	2. Return to the Castle

Finally arriving back “home,” Tsukishima descended from the small jet into a large cargo bay and hangar. There was hustle and bustle as Kingsman employees checked over the jet and refueled in preparation for the next agent mission. Tsukishima sighed at the ruckus surrounding him and took long quick strides out of hangar to get his debriefing over and done with. Unfortunately, he was interrupted from his walk down a hallway by a short blip from his earpiece.

_“Tsukki, you’re wanted at The Round Table”_ a quiet voice stated in Japanese into his ear. Tsukishima clicked his tongue as he turned on his heels and heading in a different direction than intended.

“Shut up, Merlin” he responded out of habit, while he walked. He defaulted to his native tongue as spoke, _“you know you’re not supposed to use that name while we are on the clock.”_

_“Sorry, Tsukki,”_ the intangible voice snickered. Merlin continued, _“The only person who could hack this private channel I made is Merlin Prime, so I’m not too worried. We’ve been friends for how many years? It would be awkward to call you anything else.”_

Tsukishima huffed. Merlin, or better known to him as Yamaguchi Tadashi, used to be more timid when they were kids. But, after coming with Tsukishima to London and getting recruited into Kingsman as a Merlin, Yamaguchi has gotten cheekier. It was a generally good that his friend gained some confidence, but, right now, it was just annoying. 

“You better not slip up then, Merlin. Just call me by my agent name.”

“Oh, please. Your agent name isn’t that much different anyways.”

Before Tsukishima could respond with a snarky comment back, he was at the large double doors of The Round Table. He slowly took a breath and straightened out his suit to regain his composure before pushing open the door handles.

The inside of the meeting room had some traditional English sense with its historical busts and paintings along the perimeter, but also some clean modernity with cream walls and slate carpeting. Tsukishima was told that the old meeting room had emerald wallpaper and a mishmash of patterns and wood finishes-very Victorian, cluttered, and, in his opinion, ugly. In the middle of the room stood a long oval table made of dark elm wood with fourteen seats surrounding it. A few chairs were already occupied by other suited agents. Lancelot and Bedivere sat in some middle seats of the table, while the two most senior agents, Galahad and Tristan, sat closest to the head. At the very head of the table, directly facing the doors, sat the eyepatch adorned leader of the Kingsman. At the sound of the doors opening, all of them looks at Tsukishima.

Arthur smiled in recognition, “Ah, Agent Kay. Welcome back. Please, do have a seat as we are about to start.”

Tsukishima gave a quick nod and moved away from the double doors that slowly closed behind him. He noticed the silver haired Bedivere wave him over with a motherly smile and beckon at the seat to his left. Rather than a typical suit, Bedivere wore a burgundy single breasted blazer with black lapels that matched with his black slacks, oxfords, and thin bowtie. Dark brown glasses with bottom half-rims framed his hazel eyes and beauty mark at the corner of this left eye. Tsukishima, or Agent Kay, took the offer while unbuttoning his jacket as he sat next to Bedivere. On the opposite side of the table, sat Lancelot. While Bedivere kept to simple solids in his attire, Lancelot tended to dress more flamboyantly. He wore a full plaid three-piece, double-breasted suit, threads of mint green, red, and white crossing a light tan canvas. The whole attire was dressed with complimentary mint green tie with silver pin and a red patterned pocket square. It hurt Tsukishima's eyes just a little bit. 

He then tapped the side of his glasses to activate the hologram view. Suddenly, many of empty seats surrounding the present members were filled with other suited agents, all with glasses adorning their faces and hair styled in neat side-parts (except Geraint who kept his black hair in a clean buzz cut). 

“Now that everyone who can be here is present, we will begin.”

Meetings will all the agents were few and far between as many were off on dangerous missions all over the world. After the thwarting Poppy and the Golden Circle, there was an overwhelming number of cases than needed the Kingsman and so Arthur, Galahad, and Tristan recreated the agency from the ground up. Surprisingly, staffing and reconstruction were near original levels-maybe even better-Galahad once bragged to Kay. Even without the missing agents, there was a total of nine present-Gaheris, Geraint, Lamorak, and Gawain were in hologram form.

The meeting was rather typical, each present agent gave updates or debriefed their missions while Arthur assigned new ones and informed everyone of national and international news of import. Close to the end, Arthur announced, “I hoped to say this when Gareth and Percival were available, but timing wouldn’t allow it. We may soon have a new agent with us. He has shown great promise in training, so we hope to introduce him soon to all of you.” 

There were some murmurs among those present until one of Gaheris’s extremely long arms shot up and he shouted out excitedly, “What’s this person like?”

“This ain’t a school, you know, Geraint.” At the comment, Geraint blushed in embarrassment and quietly swore in Russian at Lamorak, who ignored it and continued, “but it would be good to know a little about ‘im, right Arthur?” 

Arthur nodded and continued, “the agent prospect is what you may call a genius, a diamond in the rough one might say. We actually found him through Lancelot…” Lancelot just crossed his arms and frowned at the comment as Arthur continued.

Tsukishima could care less about who this new agent was and wanted the meeting to end so he could go to bed. He could feel the fatigue creep up his body the longer he sat. If it weren’t for Bedivere’s inconspicuous poking, Tsukishima would have fallen asleep as Arthur's soothing voice droned on. 

“And with that, our meeting is adjourned. Godspeed,” Arthur finally declared after what seemed like hours to Tsukishima. 

All the agents tapped their glasses or took them off. Those who were holograms dissipated while those physically present stood up. Tsukishima was thrilled to finally be able to leave only to have that hope dashed as Arthur cleared his throat, “Agent Kay, a moment of your time.” Tsukishima held the urge to click his tongue as he sat back down. Bedivere gave his shoulder a sympathetic pat as he passed while Lancelot gave a cheeky smile and a wink, both heading out of the room. 

Once the doors closed, it was only Tsukishima, Galahad, Tristan, and Arthur left. Even though he was mildly confused why the two agents were still there, Tsukishima held his tongue and looked to Arthur, who began.

“Firstly, thank you for your work in Serbia this past week, Agent Kay. I've gotten word that all the children have been returned to their homes. You did a beautifully clean job.” Compliments tended to come before requests. Tsukishima frowned and cut in, “It’s part of the job. Now, what do you need of me, Arthur?”

“Ever brusque and to the point with you, Kay. You really do embody that part of legend” chuckled Arthur. He ignored the Kay's annoyed tone and continued, “you already know a little about Agent Tristan’s origins, yes?”

Tsukishima nodded. It was common knowledge in the Kingsman that Tristan wasn’t an original member; rather, he transferred from the Kingsman sister agency, Statesman. With that mention, Tristan spoke up in his southern drawl that he couldn’t get rid of, “With everythin’ that happened with the Golden Circle and Kingsman, we” he beckoned to himself, Arthur, and Galahad, “thought it’d be a good idea to keep the relationship goin’ between Kingsman and Statesman. Sometimes we have our agents go take a visit. See the sites and meet some of the agents there.” 

It dawned on Tsukishima rather quickly, what Tristan was implying and he didn't like it.

“You want me to go there, like some child going on a field trip,” he stated in a deadpan tone. Galahad, sensing the annoyance building in Agent Kay, slipped into his East London accent as he quickly added, “it’s a real good experience, yeh? Other agents have done it; Percival is actually working with the Statesman right now. We thought it would be a good learning experience.” Tristan also sputtered to add some positive comments, but Tsukishima interrupted him.

"No, you're sending me on a time out from my duties here." Tsukishima glared at Arthur. "Haven't I followed all your orders and have been a good 'kingsman' for your country? I don't see why I'm being sent to the middle of nowhere." Tristan rose up from his seat with a "hey!" at the insult to his hometown, while Galahad stood up in preparation to stop his friend from pummeling Kay. 

Arthur let out a small sigh and motioned for the two senior agents to sit back. He stood up and looked Tsukishima in the eyes (although Tsukishima wasn’t sure if he should focus on Arthur’s single eye or both eye and eyepatch). 

“Tsukishima Kei.” Hearing his real name from his boss caused Tsukishima to inhale sharply. Arthur only used an agent’s real name in dire situations or when expressing things intimately. “You have been a boon to us in Kingsman. Your intelligence and observational skills are par none and you have been exemplary as an agent. However, as I have learned from experience," he glanced at Galahad and turned back to Kay, "being a good agent doesn't mean we must shun humanity, Tsukishima Kei. I think that this experience with the Statesman will help you, not only become a better agent, but a better man.” 

After saying what he wanted to, Arthur sat back down and continued, “we won’t force you as there are plenty of other missions we can assign to you, but we hope you will take this opportunity.” 

There was silence in the room while Tsukishima processed what Arthur just said. He didn't quite understand. What did he mean by shun humanity? The silence continued with all eyes on Tsukishima. It was getting awkward so he finally spoke, “I’ll do it, but I’m not bringing back any souvenirs for you.” 

Arthur’s lips pressed into a small smile and chuckled, “glad to hear it, Kay. Please see the Merlins for your briefing. You are dismissed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first actual chapter! No Kuroo yet (I did say this would be a slow burn). From here on, I will be adding fun facts about the story or agents in these notes.
> 
> Speaking of, there are a lot of agents! I matched all twelve major Knights of the Round Table to Haikyuu characters (except Galahad and Tristan). I thought it would be fun to keep their names hidden for now and slowly reveal who they are.  
> Can you guess who is who?
> 
> Some clear "gimme" agents  
> Arthur – Of course, Arthur could be none other than Harry Hart. There’s not much to say. I imagine Harry being a really caring Arthur, although he may not show it in the everyday. He would be the type to make the effort to learn all the names of Kingsman employees and send them birthday cards at work. 
> 
> Galahad – Eggsy continues his role as Galahad. Now the most senior agent of Kingsman behind Arthur, he has a lot on his shoulders, but takes it all in stride. He may be a Kingsman, but he’s still Eggsy underneath it all. He and Tristan became rather good friends over time and hit the pubs on their off time. This story deviates from the movie, so Eggsy isn't married to Tilde, nor will she be mentioned (I personally thought her character was just as a convenient plot point in the movie and it didn't sit well with me). 
> 
> Tristan – It was already probably evident with the “southern drawl” that Tristan is our ol’ pal Tequila from The Golden Circle movie. Similar to how the knight Tristan ran off with his lover, Tequila left Statesman to join the Kingsman. I imagined that Tequila enjoyed helping Harry and Eggsy out in rebuilding Kingsman so much that he decided to stay for good, rather than return to Statesman. He still sometimes visits the Statesman and acts as a liaison between the two agencies.


	3. Country Road, Take me Home

Tsukishima couldn’t help but let out a deep sigh after leaving The Round Table. To be sent off to some other agency for “a new experience” sounded tedious and unwarranted. They even tried to convince him that it would be fine by mentioning Percival-which was a low blow on their part. He took off his glasses for a moment to rub his eyes in fatigue. And yet, hearing that Percival may be at the Statesman compound at the same time as Tsukishima put a small smile on his face. Percival was the closest to being a mentor to Tsukishima when he passed Kingsman training and took on the name of Kay. Yet, how long has it been since they’ve last met face to face? It must be at least a few months with one-or both-of them being away on missions. Seeing Percival would be the only respite from this new “mission,” he thought. 

Tsukishima headed off in the direction of the Merlins’ lab. After the previous Merlin sacrificed his life to help thwart the criminal Golden Circle organization, Arthur and Galahad, though quick-minded, were baffled by the sheer amount of work the man did before he passed away. He was Kingsman’s sole strategist, engineer, and support during his time. Although it was a testament to his capabilities (God, rest his soul), the two surviving Kingsman decided it would be best to split the work of Merlin between multiple people, as well as a safety precaution if any of them died. Thus, Team Merlin was born.

It didn’t take long for the metal door of The Hovel to slide open and the freckled face of Yamaguchi Tadashi appeared before Tsukishima. Rather than the suits that Kingsman field agents wore as uniforms and armor, the Merlins went for clean comfort in their attire. Yamaguchi sported some fitted khakis and a dark-almost black-navy sweater over a white dress shirt that had the first couple buttons undone. The freckles stretched across his cheeks as Yamaguchi smiled at his childhood friend. 

“Agent Kay, it good to see your face! I hope you’re ok with the others being in here right now.” Tsukishima just nodded in affirmation as he entered the lab. 

Yamaguchi was Merlin 3 out of four who shared the large space. The left side of the room looked like a technology haven-full of Kingsman equipment and electrical tools and parts. The right side transitioned into an open-concept office with multiple desks, computer, and screens neatly arranged. There, Merlin 2 and Merlin 4 were gathered around one computer, discussing something. Merlin 2 (endearingly called “Lady of the Lake” for her ethereal beauty) brushed her long black hair behind one ear as she looked up and calmly nodded in acknowledgement to the agent’s presence. On the other hand, Merlin 4 seemed to jump and scramble once she noticed someone new in the lab, her blonde ponytail swishing to and fro. Once Yamaguchi and Tsukishima passed by, the two female Merlins when back to what they were doing. 

Beyond the initial spaces, there was a small sitting area with a low coffee table and plush couches as well as a kitchenette. Finally, in the far left corner, was what looked like a dorm of a university student in the throes of final exams. Papers and tech equipment scattered about on two desks, snack food wrappers littered the floor, and several blankets were piled high onto the desks and chair in the area. 

“I still don’t know how the rest of you can work with that,” Tsukishima grimaced as he tilted his head at the messy corner. Yamaguchi only chuckled knowingly, “if I got a quid for every time I heard that, I would be a rich man. But, you know that Prime has his methods. Would you like the usual?” 

“Yes, please.” 

Tsukishima got comfortable on a couch as Yamaguchi shuffled to the kitchenette to brew some tea. When he returned, he had a tray prepared with two cups, a kettle to share, silverware, and a couple slices of strawberry shortcake. 

“ _Your after-mission special_ ,” he happily announced in their native tongue, handing a cake plate to Tsukishima, who gratefully took it. It was a ritual they did every time Tsukishima returned from a mission-a time for them to catch up and silently thank the universe that Tsukishima could live another day. Although Tsukishima would constantly reassure his best friend that he was trained for any situation, Yamaguchi couldn’t help but worry. Field work was as dangerous as it can get, and many people had their lives cut short because of it. Several minutes passed in comfortable quiet as the two sipped tea and ate cake, until Yamaguchi finally pointed out the elephant in the room.  
_“We heard about your new mission assignment. Taking a trip to the states, huh?”_ Tsukishima let out a long sigh before responding, _“Arthur did his gentleman guilt trip on me.”_ Yamaguchi smiled in understanding.

_“He really is a wizard at convincing people. But, you know, he’s probably telling the truth. Previous agents who went and worked with the Statesman had positive results. Remember when Lancelot can back from his trip?”_

Boy, did Tsukishima remember. After returning from his Statesman mission, Lancelot, who was such an enormous, annoying flirt to anyone who had a pulse, severely toned down. Although he still joked and flirted on occasion, there was a greater sense of focus from him that even Arthur was surprised. 

_“And Bedivere? I think he’s still in regular contact with the Statesman agent he worked with. I overheard them chatting on multiple occasions,”_ Yamaguchi continued.  
That was less convincing to Tsukishima, since Bedivere was already a considerate guy. Although, keeping regular long-distance contact sounded rather atypical, even for the kind Bedivere. Yamaguchi could see the gears turning in Tsukishima’s head after his comments. 

_“I know you might feel like Kingsman is tossing you aside with this, but I think Arthur has a point.”_ He sagely stated. Yamaguchi set his teacup down on the table before leaning closer to Tsukishima. His olive-green eyes staring into golden honey ones. He lowered his voice so only his friend could hear, _“it’s ok to trust people to have good intentions for you, Tsukki. Try to make the most out of this.”_

At that point, it was hard for Tsukishima to argue with Yamaguchi. After more than ten years of friendship, they understood each other so well that telling untruths was pointless. If Yamaguchi said that this might be a good idea, then Tsukishima could only-begrudgingly-trust his judgement. Sensing Tsukishima’s compliance, Yamaguchi stood up and smiled, switching back to English.

“Let me get Merlin Prime, and then we can go over your briefing and equipment.”

* * *

A couple days passed after his briefing with the Merlins. Now, Tsukishima found himself sitting alone in one of Kingsman’s private jets, flying to Kentucky, USA. Although he still wore a Kinsgman suit, he doffed the jacket and tie for now, even undoing the first two buttons of his shirt to let his neck breath. He brushed his bangs to the side (why put in the trouble to style his hair for just sitting in a plane) to keep them from tickling his eyebrows. It would be a few more hours before the jet landed, which was plenty of time for Tsukishima to review his briefing before taking a much-needed nap. He pulled out a small tablet and unlocked the double encryption. With a long, slender finger, he pulled up some files to read. 

Unlike the Kingsman agency that went into the tailoring business as a front, their American cousin Statesman went into “the booze business” as Tristan would say. Tsukishima smirked, remembering Tristan’s lamentations that he could no longer drink to his heart’s content once he transferred to Kingsman. Although Tsukishima personally disliked the taste of alcohol, he could see the benefits of running such a company. The stocks for Statesman Whiskey and Distillery were consistently high, meaning the business had plenty of profits that could be used for the secret intelligence side of things. Statesman was the reason Kingsman was able to get back on its feet so quickly, by providing the resources and money to rebuild five years ago. 

He tapped to open another file titled _The Golden Circle_.

It was baffling how an underground drug empire run by a 1950’s-nostalgic businesswoman could bring down the Kingsman. Yet, Poppy and The Golden Circle did it with precision missiles in one fell swoop as a part of her nefarious plan to ransom the lives of hundreds of thousands of civilians worldwide to force governments to allow her business to go public. She knew that Kingsman could stop her, so she nipped that obstacle in the bud, or at least she tried. Unfortunately for her, Galahad and the old Merlin survived and were able to get in contact with Statesman. With their joint effort, they not only reunited with the current Arthur (who was assumed dead at the time), but also ended Poppy and her plans. 

Now, years later, Kingsman was back and better than ever and the relationship with Statesman was going strong, which is now where Tsukishima found himself. He took a moment to look out the window and reflect on the last few years. When the incident with The Golden Circle happened, Tsukishima was in the middle of his third year in university. Since Japan already had extremely strict drug laws and the situation cleared up rather quickly, he didn’t understand the severity of the situation at the time. He just went on with his student life, getting high grades and playing intramural volleyball with Tadashi. It wasn’t until he graduated-with honors-and was offered an internship in London that his life drastically changed…

* * *

It wasn’t until the pilot announced their decent that Tsukishima woke up. He must have dozed off while taking a walk down memory lane. He grumbled a little when he looked down to see his dress shirt had become wrinkled from the extended sitting position. Heading to the plane’s bathroom, he tossed his shirt off and grabbed some toiletries to go and make himself presentable before they landed. 

After taking a shower and brushing his teeth, Tsukishima took a look at himself in the mirror. When he was younger, he used to be all height and nothing else-his mother would nag him for being just skin and bones. Now, being a Kingsman, he was still one of the tallest agents (only Gaheris beat him), but the extensive physical training filled him out quite a bit. All 195cm of him was now hard muscle sheathed in skin milky pale skin. Although he didn’t build muscle like some other agents, there was no doubt of his physicality as every twist or tense of his body revealed well-defined lines. Grabbing a fresh white shirt, he buttoned it all the way and tucked it into his solid light gray suit pants. Out of the selection of ties on a rack, he pulled a navy tie with golden diagonal stripes around his neck. 

Once that was in place, he scooped up some hair wax and swept it up through his hair. His wavy blonde locks slowly condensed and flattened as he sculpted it into the typical Kingsman side-part, a clean and classy look for any man. He felt the jostle of the jet as it landed in Louisville International Airport, signaling to him that he needed to finish up. Heading back into the main cabin, he pulled on his matching light gray double-breasted suit jacket and button it up. To finish the ensemble, he put on his black framed glasses and a fresh pair of brogues in a light brown color that wouldn’t show as much dirt and grime that would inevitably collect while walking through Statesman Distillery’s outdoor complex. In hand, was his trusty Kingsman umbrella and briefcase as he descended from the jet. 

It was an uneventful drive from the airport to the Statesman complex. Even though it wasn’t that far from Louisville proper, it felt like Tsukishima was stepping into another time when he entered. The low wood buildings and dirt paths looked like they came out of an old western movie and many of the people working were wearing cowboy hats. Beyond the low buildings was the main tower, which was ridiculously shaped like a large metal whiskey bottle. It was as if the architect wanted the tower to be so unique and clever, only for it to look absolutely daft. 

Tsukishima just shook his head and looked for the information office. When he approached, a chipper brunette woman gave him a toothy smile and jovially asked, “Are ya here for a tour, dear?”

Inside, Tsukishima could already feel a headache coming. He hated interacting with people, especially overly friendly or chipper ones, but he went ahead and gave a pleasant smile back.

“Yes, I am. I believe I’m scheduled for the 2 ‘o clock tour?” He could see the woman’s cheeks go slightly pink and eyes glossy after he spoke. 

“You got quite the charmin’ accent on you. You British?” Tsukishima maintained his smile and he mentally eyerolled. He spent a long time to perfect his accent to fit in, but now he’s haunted by this redundant question whenever he speaks to non-UK strangers. He holds his tongue though, instead laying it on thick. 

“Yes, I’m from London. I’m here on holiday. So, the tour?” The woman gets startled by his question and blushes harder. 

“Oh, sure thing, hun! Name?”

“Oliver Taylor.”

“Right. I see you on the list here, Mr. Taylor. You can take this visitor’s badge ‘n wait right outside with the other guests. Your tour guide will be right out.” 

“Why thank you, miss. Do have a lovely day.” He can hear her sigh as he turns around and heads out the door. His smile immediately dropped after closing the door.  
He found the rest of the tour group, mostly couples and locals showing their visiting friends around. He kept a slight distance away, even once the tour guide appeared and led them on the tour. 

After an hour listening to unimportant drivel, the banal tour came to an end in the place everyone was probably looking forwards to the most: the tasting room. It was a large open room covered from top to bottom in dark woods and cowboy paraphernalia. There were two long bars on opposite sides of the room and a scattering of standing tables and stools in the center. Continuing to follow the tour group, Tsukishima heading to the bar, where the tenders deftly grabbed squat glasses and bottles and then poured generous sample of bourbon. 

After being handed a glass, Tsukishima quietly found a table in the back of the room where he had a clear view of the entrances and everyone inside. Kingsman and Statesman were cousin agencies, but that didn’t stop him from being cautious. Ambushes were common occurrences wherever a spy goes, hence why he kept his disguised briefcase and umbrella close at hand. Unbuttoning his suit jacket, Tsukishima took a seat on a stool, keeping observation. Without much thought, he brought the sample glass to his lips and nearly gagged on the strong alcohol. Anyone who said they enjoy the taste of liquor was a liar, he grimaced. 

“It has a beautiful color when you look at it in the light,” a smooth, deep voice coming from his right side.

Tsukishima didn’t get startled at the abrupt comment-Kingsman training taught him that a gentleman never jumps and to always be on his toes. That being said, Tsukishima did not expect someone to appear near him so quietly and without notice-it was suspicious. Instead of fully turning, he took a low, analytical glance towards the direction of the voice that interrupted his thoughts. 

A few feet from his stool, he saw a pair of black cowboy boots peeking out under dark wash jeans that were belted but hung slightly low on the man’s hips. His glance continued upwards to notice a buttoned black vest hugging a narrow waist and a pale red dress shirt fitted well across broad shoulders. Further up, he saw a nicely chiseled jaw and a sharp slightly upturned nose. Once he reached the rest of the person’s face, he balked inwardly. Although Tsukishima could admit that the man was naturally handsome and dressed well enough, said man had one of the most absurd hairstyle Tsukishima has ever seen; black hair spiked up and out in several directions with bangs completely swept to the right, covering one of the man’s half-lidded cat-like eyes. 

Eye contact was made, and the man gave a friendly smile, before drawling out with the mildest of southern accents, “If you look at me like that, sir, you’ll make me blush.”  
Viscerally, Tsukishima frowned and glared at hearing the ridiculous comment, but quickly reverted to a more neutral face once he caught his mistake. The man didn’t seem to notice as he looked at a thick clipboard that was tucked under his arm. 

“Mr. Taylor, I presume?” Tsukishima kept his neutral face and nodded, confirming his “false” identity. 

“I’m one of the tour guides here at Statesman Distillery. You can call me Kuroo.” He tapped on an official nametag that was fastened to his vest. Glancing at a clipboard again, he continued, “I see you’re signed up for the VIP tour. You must be quite the whiskey man.”

There it was-the code phrase. Yamaguchi and Merlin Prime briefed Tsukishima about this before he left. Although Tsukishima hated the song and dance of having roundabout, coded conversations, he understood why they happened. Have to keep things covert after all. Without giving away any sense of anticipation, Tsukishima crossed one long leg over the other and slowly lifted his glass to the light, as if complying to the man’s suggestion and contemplating the whiskey’s color. 

“Whiskey is fine, but I think I could go for a glass of _champagne_ ,” he says quietly, slowly glancing at the rooster-haired tour guide.

Although his black hair was swept over his right eye, Tsukishima noticed Kuroo’s cat-like eyes widen just a fraction. His expression quickly changed from one of mild surprise to one of recognition, with the corner of his lips twisting from a customer service smile into a small smirk. 

“Now you know that this is a distillery, right? If you want champagne, I know a good winery down the way.”

“I know. But, I just closed out a sale on a large order of _suits_. I could use a celebration fit for a _king._ ” Tsukishima paused to look at the “tour guide,” waiting for any sort of reaction. 

For a moment, Kuroo just stood there, eyes slowly dragging from Tsukishima’s face down the long lines of his suit before returning to make eye contact. His initial smirk grew even larger, revealing a few sharp teeth. 

“Well, Mr. Taylor. I think we can arrange something for you. We can start your tour right now if you’d like, or would you rather finish that glass first?” 

Tsukishima rebuttoned his suit jacket as he stood up to his full height. Unsurprisingly, he was several centimeters (or a couple inches as Americans would say) taller than Kuroo-he felt an unwarranted sense of superiority at that minor fact. He hooked his umbrella over his left arm and grabbed his briefcase, leaving the foul drink nearly untouched on the table. With his own smirk, Tsukishima spoke. 

“Lead the way, Mr. Kuroo.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! This chapter ended up being far longer than expected, since I just ended up adding more and more in an attempt to give more context and detail. At the very least, Tsukishima and Kuroo finally meet! How will this "VIP tour go?" 
> 
> Now, here are some fun facts!
> 
> On Tsukishima’s false identity – As he is a Japanese man in a different country plus a secret agent, Tsukishima thought it would be a safe idea to adopt a different civilian alias that wouldn’t get much notice. I first thought to use the surname “Moon,” but that seemed too on the nose. Both Oliver and Taylor are rather common British names. “Taylor” was chosen as a play on the word “tailor.”
> 
> On men's suits (based on my general research) - There maybe a few mentions of buttoning and unbuttoning suit jackets. This is because it's imperative that men unbutton their jackets if they are about to sit down. This prevents the jacket from stretching and getting wrinkles as you sit. Once they stand up again, they can button their jacket up to maintain the lines of the suit as well as emphasize body lines. That being said, in some countries like Japan, it could be seen as rude to unbutton your jacket (especially at job interviews), so you may see people sitting with their jacket still buttoned. 
> 
> Bananny ended up guessing quite a few agents correctly, so here's some info on them!
> 
> Bedivere (Sugawara Koushi) – Yes, it’s Suga! @_miu_a ‘s AU had setters as Kingsman so I decided to keep them the same in my fic. In legend, Bedivere was one of Arthur’s most loyal knights as well as one of the most handsome. It seemed fitting for Karasuno’s mom to take on that role. In Kingsman, Suga tends to mother a lot of the younger agents, especially Kay (Tsukishima), Merlin 3 (Yamaguchi), and Merlin 4. He has deep friendship with Merlin 2. Although he may seem like a pushover, Suga is a senior agent who is effective, if not a little chaotic and reckless, in the field. 
> 
> Gaheris (Lev Haiba) – The Russian was probably a dead giveaway that it’s Lev. In lore, Gaheris was known as the adventurous action-seeker in King Arthur’s court. I thought Lev’s over-confidence and exuberance fitt well with this. XD Although all the Kingsman learn the basics of various languages (or get help translating from the Merlins), Lev is a skilled linguist underneath his immature attitude. He is fluent in at least seven languages (English, Japanese, Russian, Chinese (both Mandarin and Cantonese), Spanish, and German) and probably many more.
> 
> Lancelot (Oikawa Tooru) – The second setter from @_miu_a ‘s AU! There was no one else who could embody the romanticism of Lancelot other than Oikawa. Another slightly more senior agent, Oikawa differs form Suga in that he is a terrible mentor to newer agents-either he gets annoyed with them or they get annoyed with him. That being said, no one can inspire and bring out the best in other than Oikawa (when he isn't being insulting or teasing). He is the king of espionage and is the most “James Bond” like out of the Kingsman, being able to charm whoever he needs to, no matter the gender.


	4. Popping Bottles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Warning: This chapter has some mentions of violence against people of color and the lgbtq+ community as well as one description of graphic nature.**

It was peacefully quiet as Tsukishima followed Kuroo out of the tasting room and towards the ugly bottle-shaped main building. With any luck, it would stay that way thought Tsukishima as the two of them entered an empty elevator. Once the doors closed, Kuroo turned to Tsukishima. 

“So, you’re also in Kingsman, huh?"

Tsukishima had the shittiest luck. 

“And you are with Statesman,” he replied, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

Kuroo sniggered at the back-handed statement. “Sorry, for asking the obvious. It’s not every day we get y’all visiting. Just wanted to start some conversation.”  


“Well, Mr. Kuroo. I would rather end this conversation,” Tsukishima coldly stated. 

Rather than looking insulted or angry, which is the usual reaction Tsukishima expected for his biting comments, Kuroo just whistled a long lilting note.  


“Well, aren’t you cute.” Tsukishima neck almost snapped at how quickly he turned to look at the rooster-haired man with a glare.

“I beg your pardon?”

Kuroo just shrugged his shoulder, looking straight ahead with a provoking smirk on his lips. “I’m just thinking out loud. All y’all Kingsman are attractive fellas, but I think you’re the cutest one yet.”

“I didn’t know the Statesman were known to harass their guests,” the Kingsman snarled through closed teeth. Of all the ways people have described Tsukishima, cute wasn’t one he wanted to hear.

“We’re not, but at least I got you to keep a conversation going”

Tsukishima felt like he fell into some sort of trap, realizing he did the thing he explicated didn’t want to do-talk. Kurro threw down some bait and Tsukishima grabbed it hook, line, and sinker. It was at that moment, the elevator dinged, reaching its desired floor. Kurro stepped out with a triumphant smile and motioned for the blonde to follow.

The rest of their walk was silent until they reached pine double doors. Kuroo knocked three times and spoke up, “Champ. It’s me Tonic. I have a guest here for you.” There was a muffled “c’mon in” and Kuroo, or now named Tonic, opened the door for Tsukishima. 

When Tsukishima walked in, he couldn’t help but look around in mild interest. The room was wide and spacious, encased in light glossy pine wood. On either side of the antechamber, were racks of whiskey and bourbon, amber liquid glistening from the displays light surrounding them. In the main chamber was a large rectangular meeting table with leather upholstered chairs placed around it. Light streaked in from a round stained-glass window from above and from large windows behind the table. 

Standing by one of the windows stood an older man, probably in his late sixties, with white slicked back hair and neatly trimmed mustache and goatee, wearing an American sports jacket and a maroon ascot. Once Kuroo closed the door with a click, the older man looked toward the two younger with a joyful glint in his eyes.

“Well, well. Seems we have another one. Welcome to Statesman.” Walking around the table, the man came closer and gave Tsukishima a hearty handshake. Although the man was tall, around 6’1”, he was dwarfed by Tsukishima, who was four inches taller. 

“The name’s Champagne, head of this here operation, but you’ll call me Champ if you know what’s good for you. I see you’ve already met our support, Tonic,” Champ waved over to Kuroo. 

“Quite,” Tsukishima curtly answered. It took all his efforts not to scowl at the mention of the annoying black-haired man. 

“Wow, you’re a tall sonnuva gun, aren’t ya?”

“So I’ve been told.” 

Champ bellowed out a laugh at that. He slapped Tsukishima on the shoulder-hard enough for the taller man to stumble a little-and cheerfully commented to Kuroo, “this one’s a bit of a firecracker, huh, Tonic?”

“That he is,” Kuroo smirked. It was uncomfortable for Tsukishima to be the point of conversation while he’s in the same room, so he let go of Champ’s shaking hand and took a step back. 

“Kingsman field agent Kay. I was told that you would have an assignment for me.”

“Kay? Like the letter?” Champ responded with some confusion. Tsukishima was taken aback by the question and quickly shook his head and spelled it out for Champ.  
“Well, that’s an easy one! Some of y’all Kingsman have crazy names. Like, that one who worked with Rum? Bevi-something?”

“Bedivere,” corrected Tsukishima. Champ snapped his finger.

“Yes, that’s the one. Nice kid. Oh, and all those “G” names. There was that super serious fella, Gwen?”

“Gawain.”

Champ nodded with a contemplative look on his face. “Y’all should have gone a little simpler. Like Tonic here,” he beckoned to Kuroo, “short, simple, goes well with booze-easy to remember. Except, Tonic is already memorable with looks like that.”

“Oh, Boss, do go on” snickered said support. Tsukishima held back from rolling his eyes. He was pretty confident that Champ didn’t mean that comment in a positive way. But in any case, first the woman at the information desk, then Tonic, and now the head of Statesman. He knew Americans could be annoying, but this flirty? He couldn’t quite wrap his head around it. He cleared his throat a little.

“So the mission?” Champ waved his hand as if to brush off the question. 

“You just got here, Kay. I may be businessman, but I even know you can’t rush things.” Champ chuckled as if he told a good joke. “We’re waiting on a couple more people anyways so have a seat. They should be here soon. Can I offer you a drink? Our whiskey is-“

A loud slam echoed through the room as the door hit the wall. 

“Hey, hey, hey! Boss, you called us?!”

The three men turned to see a broad chested, built man charge into the room. This man wore brown cowboy boots, jeans, a loose t-shirt, and a denim jacket. A tan cowboy hat hung around his neck by its stampede string. Tsukishima couldn’t help but notice that, somehow, this man had hair even more outrageous than Kuroo’s: light gray strands streaked with black, swept up and back into several spikes reminiscent of a great horned owl’s feathers. 

Not only that, but this man had large round yellow eyes that darted about. Once they trained onto the unfamiliar figure of Tsukishima, they seemed to stare right through him, like a predator assessing prey, until they quickly shifted to Kuroo and glistened with excitement. The man charged at Kuroo and gave him a bear hug while shouted question after question. 

Following behind the yelling man, another calmly closed the door before stepping further into the room. In complete contrast to the rough and tumble first, this second man was dressed impeccably in a black and gray pinstripe suit, grey waistcoat underneath and a tie similar to Tsukishima’s but in black with thick white and thin yellow stripes. He had short black hair that gently flipped out at the ends and wore glasses that framed beautifully sharp gunmetal blue eyes. The suited man looked to Tsukishima with calm recognition.

“Ah, Kay. So you’ve finally come here.”

“Percival…” That was all Tsukishima could say before Champ interrupted the reunions by slamming his hand on the table and yelling. 

“God dammit, Tequila! What have I told you about enterin’ rooms?!” The gray-haired man, who was lively chatting with Kuroo, immediately wilted at the question. 

Tequila sheepishly muttered, “uh, I don’t remember?”

“I believe he’s told you to knock before entering, Mr. Tequila,” Percival chimed in. 

“Darn right, Tequila! I may have called you over, but you ain’t gon’ barge in here like a storm in the middle of July!” Champ closed his eyes and sighed before evening his tone and directing an apology to Kay. “My apologies for Tequila, he’s still learnin’ his manners.”

Tsukishima waved a hand to the side and responded, “no apologies needed. He seems rather… excitable.” Stupid was the adjective Tsukishima used in his head. 

Champ just sighed again and motioned with his arm, signaling all of them to have a seat. 

“Now that everyone’s here,” Champ poignantly glared at Tequila, “go ahead, Tonic.” 

Tonic just chuckled at Tequila’s scolding as he tapped on his clipboard to bring up several images onto a big television screen on the wall. Screenshots of news broadcasts popped up, set in various places: gay nightclubs in Florida and California, a predominately black church in Louisiana, an elementary school in Maine, a mosque in New York. His smile quickly faded and his eyes grew sharp as he explained.

“These are only a few sites of mass shootings here in the US within the last six months. Body count over all these types of mass shootings probably totals in the thousands, all victims are vulnerable populations here in the states: Black, lgbtq+, children, Muslims. Each gunman varied in age between 20-50 years old based on witness reports and seemed to have different motives, but we’ve noticed some commonalities between them all. First, all these crimes were committed by individual white male shooters.” He switched to a slide depicting multiple gruesome corpses, all missing their upper halves-flesh shredded and burned at the hips. 

“Second, none of the shooters were identifiable. They blew themselves up before authorities could get on the scene. The explosions added to the death toll.” He switched to another image of firearms labeled as evidence. “Third, the weapons that were used seem to be more advanced that what people typically can get. Most of them were military grade stuff, all equipped with silencers and extra modifications that improved combat capabilities.” Tonic made all the photos disappear from the screen. He looked up with a grave expression. 

“Finally, and probably the most worrisome, each case seemed to go cold within a couple weeks. News circuits on both television and on the web would go quiet and crime reports that were filed seemed to disappear. Probably the only reason people still talk about them is because of continuing protests and gun regulation efforts by some politicians.”

Tsukishima folded his hands in his lap in contemplation before speaking up. “You think there’s foul play.”

“Oh, we don’t think it. We know it,” Tequila raised his voice, his confidence returning. “Percy and I have been following everything that’s been happening and we think that some sort of big wig is pulling the strings on all of these shootings.”

The blonde Kingsman could help but raise an eyebrow as the loud Tequila spoke. Percy?

“What Mr. Tequila is trying to say is, we’ve found some evidence that there may be connections between each shooter and a higher power.” Percival handed Tonic a small usb drive, which he then plugged into his clipboard. Some new files appeared as well as a photo of an older man in a black suit and red tie. 

Percival explained, “This is Wyatt Robinson, a multi-millionaire and avid gun rights activist. As we followed some trails from the shootings and his name and money came up. We think he might be providing shooters with weapons to live out their sick desires. He also has a quite a few connections with national law enforcement, politicians, and even corporate media.”

“That seems rather convenient,” Tsukishima retorted. His eyes narrowed suspiciously. “What’s the catch?”

At this, Percival looked down with a small frown as if not sure what to say.

Champ answered instead, “you see, Kay. As much as I love my country, the United States right now is a shithole. There is a lot of issues goin’ on just within these here 50 states, but we at Statesman have to distribute manpower to other parts of the world too, like you Kingsman. Tequila and Percival are the only agents working on this and it’s gotten bigger than we thought. Although they’re mighty capable, they’ve been stretched pretty thin with preventing more shootings plus getting to the source.”

“Boss..” Tequila murmured as he drooped and looked like a sad puppy. Percival gave Tequila a comforting pat on his shoulder. 

“But,” Champ added, “that’s where you come in, Kay. We want your help in completing this mission. Arthur spoke very highly about you and I think you can work well with us here.”  
“I’m unsure if just adding me into this will make much of a difference.”

“Who said anything about just you? We’re assigning you a partner as well.”

With this, Tsukishima pushed his glasses up with discomfort. He was better at doing things alone and didn’t care for working with some random American agent he hasn’t even met yet. He quipped, “shouldn’t this partner agent be here for all this briefing?”

Champ looked at Kay in confusion until it dawned on him and he let out another large bellowing laugh. “He’s been here the whole time.” 

“What do you-“ Tsukishima’s question drifted off as Champ’s implication clicked in his mind. With mild horror, he turned his head to the Statesman support agent who was looking straight at him.

Kuroo just gave a near maniacal grin and a waved.

“Hey, partner.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I lied. I couldn't help but write another chapter, especially since the last chapter of the Haikyuu manga released today!
> 
> I actually followed Haikyuu from when the first chapter released, up to the end of the first Karasuno vs. Seijoh match. For several years after, it just drifted off of my read list for no apparent reason until recently. During my spring break, I reread the whole thing in preparation for these ending chapters. What a trip! Haikyuu is probably one of the best sports manga out there and each character shines with their depth, growth, and honest passion.  
> Thank you, Furudate-sensei for the wonderful story! I'm looking forward to what you make next.
> 
> That being said, what poor timing on my part to start writing fanficiton for a fandom that's canon story just finished!  
> I will still continue to write though and I hope the fandom still continues.


	5. Hard Liquor and Wine

Tsukishima had to use all his experience as a Kingsman and a gentleman to maintain his exterior presentation of calm and nonchalance, but one the inside he was absolutely livid. How dare this rooster-headed country boy play him, acting so flippantly and riling the Kingsman agent up, when, in actuality, he knew about the mission and their partnership the whole time. Tsukishima hated a lot of things and near the top of that list was feeling like a fool. 

Luckily, the rest of the briefing allowed the blond to calm down as there were more pressing issues than his irritation. The four agents and Champ discussed the details of the situation as well as how the mission would be split up. Tequila and Percival would take the lead and target Wyatt Robinson, while Tonic and Kay would take a support role, keeping an eye out for any other possible shootings and prevent anymore unnecessary deaths. It wasn’t long, until the four agents were dismissed by Champ; they left the meeting room to head off to their assignments. Tequila hooted and hollered with determination as he ran off, while the other three stood by the closed door

Before going their separate ways, Percival patted Tsukishima’s arm and beckoned him closer. Once the taller man leaned in, Percival murmured in his ear, “Kay, meet me in the tasting room at 22:00 tonight. Come alone.” Tsukishima kept a neutral face as he leaned back, giving only a slight nod. The senior agent gave the subtlest of smiles before turning on his heels to follow after Agent Tequila down the hall and around the corner. If Percival took a glance back, he would have seen Kay’s honey-colored eyes follow his form as the taller agent continued to stand by the door. But Percival didn’t and Kay felt mild relief at that fact.

“Good to see a fellow agent, Kay?” Kuroo’s smooth voice cut in. Tsukishima squared his shoulders before he looked at the Statesman support agent coldly, the previous incident inside the meeting room resurfacing in his mind. 

“That’s none of your concern, Mr. Tonic.” Tsukishima answered through clenched teeth. If it wasn’t bad enough that he had to leave his Kingsman duties to come here, he now had to work with this irksome man. Another lilting whistle came out of Tonic’s lips. The man rested his high-tech clipboard on his hip as he brushed his hand through the spikey mess that was his hair in mild exasperation.

“Is this about the partners thing?” The suited blonde refused to say anything, only continued to his icy disposition. Tonic just sighed before looking straight at Kay.

“Well, Agent Kay, it might have been a shock to you that we’d be partners, but that’s just how the cookie crumbles. And as partners, you are my concern, whether you like it or not.” Tonic’s eyes glinted with a sudden ferocity that made a shiver run down Tsukishima’s spine-not that he would admit it. However, just as suddenly the glare happened, it quickly reverted back to normal as he continued, “so, it’s best you follow me. Your Merlin sent you some goodies to my lab.” 

* * *

The two agents took the elevator back down to the first floor and exited the bottle-shaped main building. Passing tourists and other employees, the Statesman led Tsukishima to a black wooden building: the cask storehouse (where all the whiskey was aged, the guide pointed out on Tsukishima’s tour). Instead of grabbing a door handle, Kuroo pressed on a hidden wood panel to reveal an advanced biometric scanner, which he inconspicuously pressed his pointer finger on. There were multiple clicks before the door slowly drifted open.

The inside of the storehouse was larger than expected and dimly lit, large ten-foot tall casks rested on their sides, each with the Statesman Distillery logo burned into them. They loomed over the two tall men. Kuroo deftly walked past many of these looming casks until he reached one in the back, pressing another hidden panel-this time on the side of the cask. There was another biometric scanner, which he placed his whole palm on. The cask’s round side panel split down the middle and swung open. Instead of a flood of whiskey spilling out, the inside of the cask was completely empty. Kuroo gave a slight bow and waved Tsukishima in. “Guests first,” he said with his usual smirk.

Tsukishima huffed a little and walked into the large cask; Kuroo followed soon after-his cowboy boots clacking on the cask’s wood floor. Once both men were inside, the side panel slowly closed back up. There was a moment of darkness before hidden lights from above turned on and the disguised elevator smoothly descended. 

Being the second time the two were in an elevator and ignoring the fact that their previous interactions didn’t go too well, Kuroo took his chances and spoke up, “do you guys still hide your base in the same place as before?” 

“That’s classified information…” There was a pause, before Tsukishima sighed and-against his better judgement-decided to humor the man this one time. “We have a travel system from our main tailor shop as well as other locations across London.”

“Oho? Didn’t the Golden Circle nuke the place five years ago? Wouldn’t it have been safer to relocate?”

“Well, it would have been difficult to explain to authorities why there were large tunnels and secret chambers connected to a small tailor shop wouldn’t it? Much easier to call it a gas explosion and rebuild in the same spot.” Kuroo nodded in understanding. There was another moment of silence.

“How’s our old Tequila doing? I guess y’all call him Tristan now.”

Tsukishima thought for a moment. “He’s fine. I think Tristan has adjusted to London and Kingsman life well enough… Although his physique makes him stand out. He still looks like a gorilla in any suit he wears.” With that comment, Kuroo burst out in ugly hyena cackling, which took Tsukishima by surprise. During their short time together-besides that unnerving glare just before-he only saw Tonic smirk or smile coolly. This laughter was ridiculously unbecoming, and yet seemed oddly fitting for the man. 

By the time Kuroo calmed down-wiping tears from his eyes-they reached their destination. 

Unlike the Kingsman base, which tried to incorporate British interior design sensibilities within the more practical structures of a secret base, the Statesman base seemed to be built solely on efficiency. Everything was white or steel and with no additional furnishing-no paintings, no bust, nothing to distract the eye. It felt rather clinical. 

They walked down an echoing hallway until they reached an indiscriminate door, that Kuroo tapped a card on to unlock. “Welcome to my home away from home,” he cheekily announced. The inside of the lab matched the minimalism of the rest of the base, with tile flooring and metal walls. However, there seems to be some accoutrements added by the support agent. In one corner was a cot with multiple pillows and blankets folded away. On a large L-shaped metal desk laden with papers and computer monitors, Tsukishima noticed a couple framed photos of beaches and what looked to be an incomplete model of some molecule. 

The slightly shorter raven-haired man noticed the observing eyes stop on the model and explained, “that’s DHA, it’s an Omega-3 fatty acid. Not super complex, but it’s a nice time killer to build. Anyways, your goodie bag is over here. You Kingsman really go overboard with things.” The taller blonde stayed silent and turned to look. 

On another metal table sat a large sleek traveler’s trunk laid on its side. Next to the table, there was a small clothing rack with several garment bags hung up and a couple shoe boxes laid on the floor underneath. Every item was embossed with the Kingsman logo-a golden ring with a “K” laid on its side. Tsukishima flipped up a panel on the trunk and punched his agent specific code into a hidden keypad. Once a couple unlocking clicks were heard, he lifted the lid to reveal a display of Kingsman gadgets precisely placed into perfectly shaped cutouts. 

There were additional cartridges of varying ammunition, a couple pistols, several black and gold fountain pens, gold lighters, an extra watch, and a couple smaller black boxes that Tsukishima didn’t recognize. At the very center of the inner lid was another black Kingsman umbrella-the most versatile and iconic weapon of their agency. 

Kuroo put an arm around the Kingsman’s shoulders as he peered from into the trunk. He muttered in amazement, “look at that spread. You Kingsman know how to be fancy.”

“Please remove yourself from me,” Tsukishima asked in monotone, but Kuroo acted as if he didn’t hear and continued to ask, “What do the pens do?”

“Poison. Now remove your arm.”

“And the lighters?”

“Hand grenades. Your arm.”

“Oh, we have hand grenades too, but we made them into baseballs.”

“Arm. Now.”

Kuroo’s well defined arm didn’t move an inch from its place on Tsukishima’s shoulders. instead, it seemed like he was pressing it down harder. 

“These black mystery boxes look interesting,” he said, while using his free hand to reach out towards one. Without thinking, Tsukishima slapped the invasive hand away before it could grab a box, making it quickly withdraw.

“Ow, Kay. If you do that, you’ll hurt my feelings.” 

Kay took this moment to duck and twirl out of Tonic’s arm grab and close the trunk. He adjusted his glasses and retorted with his own smarmy smile, “My apologies, Mr. Tonic, but your feelings are terribly low on my priority list.” 

Kuroo gasped in mock horror as he set the back of one hand to his forehead while the other clutched invisible pearls. A shrill southern belle accent came out of the man’s mouth. “Oh, Mercy! Is that how you’re suppose to treat your dear partner, Kay? Aren’t you supposed to be a gentleman?”

Kay’s eyes glazed over as he could only stare in shock and confusion at the overly dramatic scene in front of him. He wasn’t sure how to respond. However, someone else did it for him.

A rough voice shouted out, “Are you acting a fool in here, Tonic?”

Two eerily similar figures entered the lab. Both were of similar stalky, muscular build dressed in jeans, cowboy boots, and hats with short dark hair and brown eyes. However, as they walked closer, they were easier to differentiate. The one who yelled was wearing a puffy blue vest with leather shoulder patches over a light blue flannel. He had sharp, narrow eyes and revealed tousled spikey hair as he pulled off his hat. The other wore a brown jacket and had a shorter, flatter hair and rounder, gentler eyes. They both approached Kuroo with humored expressions.

When Kuroo realized who came in, he dropped his arms to his side and reverted back to his normal smirking self. “Well if it isn’t Vodka and Rum. What do I owe the pleasure?”

The one wearing the brown jacket tipped his hat towards Kuroo and answered in a deep bass twang, “Pardon me and Vodka for coming unexpectedly, Tonic. We just finished our assignment and thought it would be better to bring our equipment in for maintenance as soon as we could.”

“Well, that’s much appreciated. Beats trying to hunt you down for them later. Let’s see ‘em.” Rather than make room somewhere, Kuroo pressed a button on his clipboard, activating a portion of the floor to rise up and become another table. 

The two returning Statesman agents started to placed things down. From closer view, the brown jacketed Rum was built like a brick shithouse- square jaw, massive shoulders, and bulk that was obviously more muscle. He lifted a black duffle bag onto the table with a heavy thud and started to pull things out: a hefty shotgun, a couple baseball bats, an excess of empty ammunition cartridges, and what looked to be a handle of a skipping rope. 

On the other hand, Vodka only pulled out twin pistols from under his vest and tossed them onto the table. 

“I see you made Rum do all the heavy lifting,” quipped the support agent. Rum laugh quietly while Vodka only shrugged before glancing at Tsukishima, as if noticing him for the first time. 

“I see there’s another one. I’m Vodka and you are?”

“Kay. It’s a pleasure,” Tsukishima responded politely.

Rum, finished emptying the duffel bag, also noticed the suited individual in their presence and quickly offered his hand to shake, which Tsukishima took. Rum gave a smile, “Besides Percival, it’s been a while since we’ve had a Kingsman visit. How’s Bedivere, by the way?”

The blonde’s eyebrows furrowed at the mention of his fellow Kingsman and apprehensively answer, “he’s fine?” 

Catching his confusion, Rum smile broadened, and he explained, “Bedivere and I worked on assignment together a while back. We chat, but you know how it is. Things get busy in our line of work.” 

Rum tilted his head at his companion and added, “actually, Vodka here also worked with one of your agents too. Lancelot, was it?”

At the mention of Lancelot, Vodka’s once neutral face quickly soured as if he smelled something rancid. He angrily spouted, “Don’t say that shithead’s name. He was a thorn in my side the whole time he was here.” Kay couldn’t help but chuckle at the visceral reaction to Lancelot.

“That’s something we can agree on.” At that conferral, Vodka’s mood picked up. He patted Kay’s shoulder and exclaimed, “you’re not a bad guy, Kay.” Kay agreed in his mind. Rum and Vodka seemed to be reasonable people; unlike the other two agents he has already met. Rum chuckled at the exchange and asked, “so who’s your partner Kay?” 

“Oh, that’d me,” Kuroo interjected with a raised hand. 

Rum hummed in acknowledgement. “Trying to get back in the field, Tonic?”  
“You could say that,” said agent hummed back. He was rolling his red shirt sleeves up in preparation for equipment maintenance. At the response, Vodka snorted, “Don’t give us that demure crap. You’ve been trying to follow Whiskey’s footsteps and get back on a mission for a while now.”

“Vodka…” Although the Tonic’s face was smiling, there was an edge to his voice.

This piqued the curiosity of the outsider of the group. Tonic working as a field agent wasn’t a common practice? And who was Whiskey? Tsukishima asked aloud.

Rum looked to the Kingsman and explained, “Whiskey is one of Statesman’s senior agents. She used to go by Ginger Ale when she was a tech expert and support until the Golden Circle incident five years ago. After the-ah-timely demise of our previous Whiskey, she took his moniker and became a field agent.”

“And Tonic, here has been trying to do the same. If only he wasn’t so good at his job. He’s probably one of the best all-round supports we have,” Vodka stated as matter of fact. There was a pause in which no one seemed to know how to continue the conversation. Sensing the awkwardness, Rum heavy handedly nudged Vodka to the door. 

“Anyways, you two probably have some mission things to do, so we’ll head out. Thank, Tonic. And, Kay, it’s been a pleasure.”

Once the sound of footsteps disappeared, Kuroo let out a heavy sigh. 

“Please don’t mind their talk. Company gossip, you know?”

At this, Tsukishima wasn’t sure what to say. Although he didn’t look forward to working with the Statesman, he couldn’t help but be curious about his intentions or his background. Tonic, for all his confident “southern charm” and provocations seemed to have other facets what he attempts to hide…

He sensed Tonic was waiting for a response, looking at Tsukishima expectantly, so Kay could only recite what he has been taught about situations like this, “a gentleman doesn’t pry.”

With that, Kuroo smiled softly. “Well, bless your heart.”

* * *

When Tsukishima entered the tasting room, it was quiet. The bright room once filled with tourist was now dim. Although he came in at 10:00 on the dot, Percival was already seated at one of the bars with two wine glasses and a bottle of Riesling. The senior agent wasn’t wearing his suit jacket or waistcoat, rather he looked quite casual in just his tie and white dress shirt with sleeves neatly rolled up to the elbows. 

“I thought I would bring something more fitting to your palate,” Percival softly spoke as he took off his glasses and motioned to an empty seat next to him. The junior agent set his gray suit jacket on the back of the chair. Once the other was comfortably seated, Percival removed the cork and poured a small amount of white wine into each glass. Grabbing their respective glasses, they raised them in a silent toast before taking a sip. After the initial drink, Percival poured again to fully fill each glass. The took quiet sips in peaceful companionship. 

Unlike the whiskey, Tsukishima tried before, the Riesling was sweet and florally aromatic. Percival knew him well to not bring something too strong or bitter. It didn’t take long for him to finish his glass. While pouring more wine, Percival chuckled, “Do you remember our mission in Lyon?”

“How could I forget?” The memories flooded Tsukishima’s mind. It was one of his first large-scale missions as Kay, as well as the first time he worked with Percival in the field. They had to go undercover at a New Year’s Eve event the target was attending. 

“You were quite green during that mission. I remember you were holding your champagne flute so tight that I thought it would snap in half.” A smile crept onto Percival’s pretty face as he looked at his junior. 

Tsukishima’s ears felt warm and he quickly countered, “I’ve gotten better.”  
“Of course, you have, Kay. I’ve never doubted your capabilities.”

“But, you have doubted me on other things,” Tsukishima lightly joked, a smile creeping up upon his face. 

Seeing Kay’s expression, Percival could help but laugh-a light mellow tinkling- “You’ve always been good at playing with words. I’ve missed your company.”

Tsukishima missed Percival as well. From the very beginning of his Kingsman career, they got along well, and Percival taught him a lot. In many ways, he admired his senior and he could feel his heart become lighter whenever in his company. It was then, when he remembered how Percival so quickly followed the loud Statesman after the meeting, that he could feel his heart drop. He couldn’t imagine the unfamiliar look of... something in Percival’s eyes as he looked at Tequila. 

“How long have you been working with him,” The bespectacled Tsukishima asked soberly. 

“Mr. Tequila?” Percival contemplated it for a moment, “About a month or so? It’s mostly been reconnaissance and the like. What, with the stopping a few shooters here and there.”

“Your partner seems like an idiot.” Percival laughed again, used to Kay’s sharp tongue. The brunette took another sip from this glass before responding, “he’s a bit hard to handle at time, but he means well.”

Feeling a little childish, Kay pursed his lips and retorted, “the mission would probably be easier if you were working with someone else.” _‘Someone like me,’_ he mentally added. Percival looked up at the ceiling in quiet contemplation. A peaceful calm never leaving his fair, demure face. 

“It may have been easier with another agent, Kay, but Mr. Tequila brings a more to the table than people may realize. Over the course of our work together, I’ve found that I truly admire him.” 

Every word from Percival’s honest admission felt like a stone added to Kay’s chest. There was a depressing heaviness where his heart was. Quickly downing the rest of the Riesling in his glass, Tsukishima stood up and wrapped his jacket over his arm. 

“I have some preparations to make for this mission. Thank you for your time and the wine Percival.” 

Percival nodded in understanding and he also stood up to follow Kay to the exit. Once they were at the door, Percival reached a hand up to Kay’s head and gently combed lithe fingers through to smooth out any loose strands of golden blonde hair. He smiled at his junior and murmured, “have a good night, dear Kay. We’ll keep in touch.” Tsukishima only nodded before heading out.

Far enough away, Tsukishima clutched his chest in frustration as he tried to quell his hastening heartbeat. His scalp still tingled where fingers once were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for reading! This chapter was a doozy for me to write (each chapter seems to get longer and longer...). Character interaction is hard, y'all. Also trying to reduce repetitive word use? I'm a little dead. BUT. New agents have been introduced! What's with Tsukishima's feelings? When will the mission actually begin? (I promise next chapter will be more action packed).
> 
> Fun Facts 
> 
> On Kuroo’s agent name – Based on Ginger Ale from The Golden Circle, Statesman support agents are named after mixers or chasers, while field agents are named after alcohols. Tonic water is a bitter carbonated soft drink that has quinine, once used by doctors before modern medicine. 
> 
> Both runningfromrealitytoanime and Bananny noticed who some previously mention agents were, so here are some small bios!
> 
> Percival (Akaashi Keiji) – The final Kingsman setter form @_miu_a ‘s AU. Akaashi is ever the calculating agent. Very few people have seen him lose his cool. Instead of having a favorite weapon, Akaashi is the type to utilize everything in his arsenal. As he and Tsukishima have similar personality traits, he took the younger under his wing. He taught Tsukishima how utilize his gadgets, maintain composure, and assess the situation even in the midst of battle. He has been working closely with Tequila for the last month and has gotten quite used to the Statesman’s antics. 
> 
> Tequila (Bokuto Koutaro) – After the previous Tequila left Statesman to become Tristan of Kingsman, Bokuto took on the moniker. A wild child with absurdly high combat sense, he’s well known throughout the Statesman agency. He is loud, rambunctious, and has ridiculous mood swings. As the type to leap before he looks, many were surprised that he was assigned to work with the calm Percival. 
> 
> Merlin 2 (Kiyoko Shimizu) – Also known as “Lady of the Lake,” the second Merlin has quite a few fans within Kingsman. A cool beauty, she was recruited for her ability to strategize in the moment and high support capabilities. She gets along well with Merlin Prime and mentors the newest to the team, Merlin 4.
> 
> Merlin 4 (Yachi Hitoka) – Although timid, don’t let her disposition fool you. The newest Merlin is determined to do her best for the Kingsman field agents. She has an eye for design and has helped create some new gadgets with the help of Merlin Prime and Merlin 3.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading this fic! I haven’t written anything in years, but this AU was bouncing around in my mind for weeks and I couldn’t help but write. I took inspiration from @_miu_a on Instagram who drew a beautiful Haikyuu x Kingsman AU, but I wanted to make it Tsukishima-centric and put my own spin on it. I'll try to update when I can, when my school schedule allows it.


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